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Relationship breakdown is painful and bad for your health

When relationship breakdown occurs the pain is palpable. While therapy is an excellent way to explore the underlying issues and create change, there are other practices which can support the difficult feelings which arise. I explore one of them this short video about the ancient Hawaian practice of Ho’Oponopono which offers an antidote to the pain of disconnection.

Being angry with someone is like drinking poison and expecting them to die

We have all experienced relationship breakdown in its many forms, it can lead to anger, sadness, frustration, despair and emptiness. All difficult emotions to be with and difficult to move. These emotions are like poison in your soul however, you can work with them and choose to protect your alignment. It takes practice, awareness and support! I offer this video as support to start the journey.


This beautiful practice which I share in the video is based on exploding the myth of separation. We are all responsible for everything that happens because “you are in me and I am in you”. When we take responsibility that is beyond our own personal jurisdiction, change can happen. I found it hard the first time I used this practice as my ego felt shame and outrage at allowing my own part, after all, others are always to blame right? But as I practised, I became aware of the softening, the wonderful effect that the practice had ON ME. And this is sometimes all we can work with, especially when the other party has walked away.

Do it for You

Do the practice for yourself! Forgiveness is for you primarily. This practice will help you to extract the poison of anger and despair from your own heart and may in time change the shape of the relationship. The buddha said it so perfectly,

There is no fire like greed,No crime like hatred, No sorrow like separation, No sickness like hunger of heart, 

And no joy like the joy of freedom. 

Health, contentment and trust Are your greatest possessions, And freedom your greatest joy. 

Look within. Be still. Free from fear and attachment, Know the sweet joy of living in the way. 

The Dhammapada

Click the image below to watch the video



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